RELATIONSHIP ATTUNEMENT

Ask yourself this...

What do you enjoyabout being in a relationship?

Really think about that for a minute...

For many it's the ability to share your world with another. To have someone to walk through life with... companionship ....intimacy.

And what then happens when you feel alone in your relationship? When you feel disconnected? When you talk, but you don't actually feel seen or heard?

Now there might be a myriad of reasons why this is playing out (if this is you), but one of the key pieces to this feeling of loneliness is that you are not attuned to one another.

And here's the thing with 'attunement' - it actually facilitates brain development. It's why people like me bang on about it, especially in regards to parenting.

See in those moments of attunement we release oxytocin (one of your happy hormones), whilst also producing growth-enhancing brain chemicals!

And this is where the magic of co-regulation is born.

So in our relationship, we want to make turning toward one another, showering each other with empathy and working to really understand what they are saying the goal.

Because let's be honest, how often do you listen to understand? Rather than listen to respond?

Dr John Gottman puts it wonderfully...

"emotional attunement is basically the skill they need to create a relationship that really works for them".